A good friend of mine wrote a poem that spoke to me. I wrote a response to it - from a different perspective. And I will post it down below. His poem can be read on his blog at http://punctuatepoorly.blogspot.com. No, this is not a shameless plug. This is of my own accord. I really enjoy reading his work - but the poem that I am specifically referencing is entitled "a thicket: robert part two" and somewhere beneath this work, is "part one" which gives you even more of a sense, more of a significance of the words. Well here is my poem, which should hopefully stand on its own, but also takes MUCH, even direct quotes, from "a thicket: robert part two," by Michael Martin.
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I mistook
For virtue,
Is your downfall
Your demise
But that will not hinder me
I will not stutter or stumble or fall
No, you are not ageless
Not
Immortal
Nor am I
And I will not waste another second
Alone
Gazing,
Sadly,
Into the mirror,
Watching age sneak upon us
In the dark
We were younger once,
Thinner too
We belonged
To eachother
But you singed me
With your cigarettes
Burnt - I still maintained my innocence
Charred, but still delicious, you said
Vanity,
Is what makes your heart ache
You can comb your hair, straighten your curls
Alter your appearance
But that won't change
The formation of your heart
Your heart
Is a thicket
Condensed
Seemingly impenetrable
But I will break through
I will get scratched, no doubt
As I prune away
To reach your center
To till the fertile soil,
Hidden underneath the brush
But I will nurture you
Until Spring
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3 comments:
thank you for your shameless plug.
1) I really like the approach you took. recycling my poem to write from the womans perspective is a novel idea and I think it works very well.
2) "But I will break through
I will get scratched, no doubt
As I prune away
To reach your center
To till the fertile soil,
Hidden underneath the brush"
I particularly like these lines. there is hope and optimism that 'he' has some sort of soul that has yet to be cultivated. you surely seem to be a persistent gardener in your poetry :)
3) in re-reading your poem, I see that it is all optimism. you are the girl who does not give up, who will, as you put it, "nurture until spring.' this makes it all the more interesting that you wrote your poem based on mine because I am an intrinsically more cynical poet that you it seems. you are persistent, I recede into the night. we fit together like a jigsaw puzzle.
I like these exercises. you write a poem and I'll write an 'answer' to it. I think it'll be interesting to see what comes out.
by the way, I can't wait to get your letter. I have much to tell you but I'll save it for my response.
mTm
I got your letter. I just about jumped out of my shoes when I saw it. I put on my bob dylan Highway 61 Revisited vinyl to Approximately Queen Jane and read it. I will be writing a response as soon as my fingers gain enough stamina.
and
you are quite the seductress in the photo you sent. I think I might stow it away in one of my favorite book of poems (Kenneth Rexroth) so that when I stumble upon his poems about beautiful women I will also stumble upon you.
Haha. I did not mean for my photo to be seductive. It is just one of my headshots. :) That Kenneth Rexroth really likes the womens. Cannot wait to receive your letter!
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